So here it is!

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Clickety-click!

Quote for the day:

“Umibig ka lang at mabigo.”

- how to lose weight, according to Kuya Dwight

Yes, I know I’ve been gone an awfully long time.  I’m a disgrace to the blogworld, but let’s not go into that now, because I’m tired of apologizing to my blog.  Cause it’s creepy.

The reason why I’m able to blog again after so long is because classes are over for this semester, so I have a little more freedom to do what I want. AND I WANNA BLOG! Still have some deadlines and an exam coming up, but we don’t want to talk about them, now, do we?

Now, I just wanna think out loud. Expect incoherence. So be afraid.  Be very afraid.

Thinking begins… now.

I must say that when I think of how left behind I am compared to my peers, the whole “growing up” thing has been unfair to me. [Now, please, save your spittle and don't tell me that growing up is overrated because as long as it's not overdone, it's not.  This world is no Neverland yet it has more than enough of its share of Peter Pans, if you catch my drift.]

It’s like the grown-up train came and went without my notice so everyone but me has hopped on.  And everyone else has got their act together, and that’s great, considering we only have one semester left in university [ack].  They all know what kind of jobs they want after graduation, some of them even know exactly where they want to work, and here I am, still frustrated that econ wasn’t as interesting as I thought it would be.

But everyone has their issues [if you have none, let's talk because I've never met one of you guys before], and that’s mine: I am the girl who can’t/won’t grow up.  [At the moment.  Hope this condition isn't permanent.]

Funny thing is, not too long ago a friend of mine told me that I was lucky because I seemed to know exactly what I was doing.  That rendered me ispitsless, I tell you.  To think that someone could actually look at me and see me as a girl with direction is encouraging, but pretty ridiculous.

I guess a lot of us look like we’ve got everything under control on the outside.  Sure, some are more willing to show their brokenness to the world [hello, members of the emo populace!], but even the most cheerful of us are/have been broken up in some way or another. To quote the pop song, we’re all “breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.”  We may try to fix brokenness by turning to – I dunno – girls/boys, television, acads, your blog[!], and for a while these things may appear to hold you together, but eventually, everything falls apart again, and it’s a mess, and you end up more broken up than you were before.

Most of you are probably familiar with the parable of the man who built his house on the sand vs. the man who built his house on the rock. To those of you who aren’t, to make the short story shorter, a huge storm came and the house built on sand got swept away, but the house that had its foundations set on rock stayed intact.  Now, note that it wasn’t the house, but the ground it was built on that held it together.

Maybe we should stop leaning on girls/boys, television, acads, blogs[!], friends, etc., and – you know – start leaning on something sturdy. A Rock.

Before I riddle this post with even more metaphors, I’ll end this madness with a question:

What holds you together?

And for a while, it made sense.

Until morning came, and I woke up.

Oy vey!

[This isn't me being emo. This is me being *points up there* cryptic.  Okey!]

Please post in your Multiply accounts, blogs, etc. Show your friends that you are against all forms of fraternity-related violence. End the culture of tolerance! Ipakita mong sawa ka na!!!

(Picture from SAWA e-group c/o LSG President Jobert Navallo)

Quote for the day:

“Kung ‘di na kaya ng sariling lakas o kakayahan, idaan nalang sa fighting spirit.”

- my sister’s guy friend Leo F.

“…At kape.”

- my sister

Recently, one of the boys nearest and dearest to my heart – let’s call him Juan – told me about his peelings for a certain someone of the opposite sex – let’s call the apple of his eye Apple.  I was both shocked and elated because:

• I had pegged Juan as one of those guys who just doesn’t have crushes [i.e. he's not entirely human]. Like, whenever friends of mine would ask me who he likes [sabay kindat], I’d be all, “Meh, don’t bother, Juan hasn’t liked anyone since the beginning of time. That boy will probably die an old maid.”
• He told me who his secret crush is! Woohoo!

Juan’s stories are really cute because it’s like he just discovered that girls aren’t just boys with curvy bits.  He went through the whole “I’ve never felt this way before” speech yesterday, and I doubled up with laughter when he said:

“Why are you girls so cool?!”

Hilarious stuff.

I didn’t tell Juan this because I didn’t want to interrupt his schoolgirl gushing, but it’s prrrobably because when we girls were having all those weird crushes for the first time, you [read: clueless] guys were making puberty ten times more miserable by snapping our bras and poking fun at the bodies we had yet to grow into. Call it bad karma, but really, you reap what you sow.  *enter smug laughter*

Anyway, why am I blogging about this in the first place?  Awhile ago something… magical happened to my friend.  But I’m getting ahead of myself.  Let’s start from the beginning.

Ehem ehem ehem.

Juan and His New Textmate

It is a Friday afternoon, and boy, is Juan in a grrrreat mood.  The week had been good to him.  He had seen Apple a couple of times, and although both times he was too scared to look her in the eye, it didn’t stop him from feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

His phone beeps.  It is a text from his Mandarin [not the actual subject] professor:

Prof Mandarin: “Have you contacted Apple yet?”

Juan thinks, “How the heck did sir find out about Apple?”  He ponders on this for about five seconds, but because of the puppy love overflowing inside him, he was bursting to talk to someone [ANYONE!!!] about his crush on Apple.  Soooo he suddenly finds himself talking about his crush to his Mandarin professor.

Juan: “Yes sir, actually I got to talk to her last Saturday, and we sat next to each other in mass, and I got to hold her hand, and we had a magical moment!” [I'm not making this stuff up, he actually did text that "magical moment" part.]

Something bothers Juan.  He feels that there is something wrong, but he can’t say exactly what that something is.  Then his Mandarin professor replies…

Prof Mandarin: “Haha. That’s cool. Tapos anong nangyari?”

Juan thinks, “There’s definitely something wrong about this scenario.” He stops walking and, clutching his cell phone in his trembling hands, it dawns on him.

What dawns on him: his professor was talking about an entirely different Apple!!! His professor was talking about Granny Smith Apple, not Golden Delicious Apple!  He was supposed to talk to Apple - not Apple - about class stuff just awhile ago.  His professor did not know about, and therefore did not want to talk about his Apple and/or his crush on her.

He quickly texts an apology to his professor explaining the awkward situation, and spends the rest of the day cradling his head in his hands and bursting into random fits of scream-into-your-pillow rage.

The End.

So I said I’d do it for him. Because I wanted him to stop before he broke something.

And that’s why I’m here right now, blogging about someone else’s love crush life.

It’s not the first time that I’ve had a guy talk to me about peelings and stuff: my boyspacefriends usually talk about flirting techniques and together, we plan out dating strategems [because behind every good date is a girl (or even an army of girls) telling him what to do].  If any of you are looking for the source of my cynicism towards dating, etc., you can place some of the blame on them. [Hai gais! ]

So because most of my guy friends are like pros already, Juan’s late introduction to puberty was refreshing.  Nice to know I’m not the only goofball in the world.

Quote for the day:

“I was like never like this to a girl before. Interested not with the sexy look [LOL!!!!], but with the sense of what we talk to.“

- *SAMWAN*‘s secret admirer
is not so secret anymore heehee.
[Bold-ing mine.]

So awhile ago, I ran into this boy that I had totally forgotten about.

[EDIT] But before everything else… PANIC AT THE DISCO!

Pic by my sister, who recently discovered that her camera had this function that lets her take theatre pictures without having the lights bleed together. Neat, eh?

‘Twas a latta fun. Not the best concert I’ve ever been to but fun nonetheless. [/EDIT]

Anyway, back to my story about running into a boy I had forgotten about. Our “history” – if you can call it that – is actually pretty interesting. Well… interesting for me. To make the short [but interesting] story even shorter, I used to hate this guy’s guts [I won't tell you why because some people might figure out who he is from that], but I ended up working with him and eventually found out that he was really, really nice. And you guys know how I like nice boys [if you don't, now you do].

*smiles*

First thoughts:

1. “OH WAW I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THIS BOY!!”
2. “OH CRAP I LOOK LIKE A BOY!” [I wasn't looking too attractive today. Let's just say that my morning didn't start on the best side of the kitchen sink.]

But he didn’t seem to mind, and actually looked pretty pleased to see me.

*smiles*

The wishful thinking beginneth.

Him: “Hi!”

Me: “Oh my gosh!”

Him: “How are you?”
My analysis: “Wow! You look great with your hair all unkempt like that!”
What he really meant: “How are you?”

[Here he grabs my hand and swings it a little, which immediately gets me all kerflummoxed, as can be seen by my answer to his question:]

Me: “Oh my gosh! How are you?! Oh my gosh!”

Him: *laughs* “I never get to see you anymore! What electives are you taking?”
My analysis: “Oh man, I missed you. You don’t like me anymore?”
What he really meant: “I never get to see you anymore! What electives are you taking?”

Me: “Um I’m taking 141…”

[And here we compare economics classes and how sucky they are.]

Me: “…And most of my electives are in AS or KAL.”

Him: “Ahh… so that’s why I never see you.
“My analysis: “Ahhh… so that’s where I’m going to hang around now.”
What he really meant: “Ahh… so that’s why I never see you.”

Me: “Yeah.” *smile* “Ihavetogodosomeresearchnowbye.”

Him: “Okay! See you around!”
My analysis: “Oh! My darling! Seeing you made my day, I hope it’ll happen again!”
What he really meant: “Okay! See you around!”

[We high five, then I quickly run up the stairs suppressing a girly squeal.]

Ah, overanalysis. ‘Tis fun. Ridiculous, but fun.

It’s great that I can blog about this particular boy because he’s not on my multiply, friendster, or facebook, and that makes this post somewhat “safe” for public consumption. Hooray!

But yeah, don’t take any of that *looks up* seriously. *sings* It’s just a little crush, not like I faint every time we touch. Nothing serious. I mean, come on, I forgot about the guy’s existence and he had to make his presence felt to remind me that – oh yeah – I think he’s a nice boy .

Quote for the day:

“I know it’s sad, but I never gave a damn about the weather, and it never gave a damn about me.”

- Panic at the Disco, Do You Know What I’m Seeing?

Awhile ago I missed my Comparative Literature class.  My first absence in the semester.  For that class.

I didn’t do it on purpose.  I swear I didn’t.

This is what happened.  I got some posters printed out at the Shopping Center.  It took a little longer than I wanted it to because the printer, you know, just wanted to make my life a little more interesting and refused to work.  Then when I was walking to Vinzon’s, where I was going to put up the posters, it started to rain.

First it was just a couple of droplets on my nose and shoulders.  It was like that for about five seconds.  Then it started to pour.  POUR.

I actually enjoy walking in the rain, but remember that I had freshly printed posters with me.  I tried shoving them in my shirt but because I was quickly getting drenched, I decided to take shelter under the nearest shade.  Which happened to be in front of the Computer Center.

I sat down.  Hoped for some friend-with-a-car to come by and save my arse.  No-one did, but I wasn’t too disappointed, because no-one ever comes when you really need them.  So I sat there, all wet and sad, with only the rain and my memories to keep me company *enter Air Supply*.

Before I knew it, it was 1:45, and I had missed my 1 o’clock class.

I was pissed.  For me neglecting to check if I had an umbrella on me [turns out I left it at the tambayan - typical].  For the rain for its perfect timing and for being so… enthusiastic.

But yeah, it was only a matter of time before I got myself stuck in the rain.  It happens every sem:

1. Last semester: I slipped and fell on my butt right in the entrance of *I-won’t-say-which-college-building-because-the-memory-is-too-painful*, then my umbrella turned inside-out in the relentless wind.  Walked to the School of Economics looking like a right turd.
2. Last last semester: I was walking from the College of Mass Communications to the School of Economics [to those of you who aren't from UP, those colleges are somekinda far away from each other, but because I like walking, I walked], and it started raining somewhere in the middle.  I took shelter in that building beside the College of Engineering [forgot the name], then when I couldn’t take it anymore because I was going to be late for my class, I ran for it.  Again, I was drenched, and to make it even worse, my class was air-conditioned. Yay me.
3. Last last last semester: I don’t remember anything from my second year because getting wet in the rain was no big deal as I was dorming back then [because I could easily change clothes].
4. Freshman year: Ah, freshman year… *sigh* …I had just come from the ADMU vs UP basketball game [we lost - haha] and it was raining water buffaloes.  Our flimsy foldaway umbrellas could’t put up a fight.  I then turned to the guys I went with [we weren't that close at the time but we're pretty good friends now I MISS YOU GUYS!!!] then suggested that we make a run for the dorm [we were near Vinzon's Hall, and we were staying at Kalayaan at the time].  Johnson was game, but Rinno had new shoes or something and didn’t want them to get ruined. And Janro just didn’t want to get wet [and even stole my umbrella, so I got wet and he stayed *somewhat* dry].

Anyway, nagkwento lang ako.

The moral of the story is:

• You can’t control the weather [among many other things], and all we can do is deal with it.
• And always bring an umbrella.

The end.

Quote for the day:

“I’m gonna be a soldier and drink coffee!!!”

- Seij [age 4] shares his mission statement to the world

“You’re gonna be a soldier too?”

- Seij recruiting me after I repeated what he said to my brother

Because I’m lazy and my brain’s hardly functioning, I browsed through my journal to find something to write about. [I started journaling again recently, cause my mom got me one of those cool notebooks with black paper, the kind that goes with pastel gel pens.]

So here’s what I got:

Lucy [not her real name] has a boypren?!?!?!

I wrote about this July 9. It was a Wednesday. And I quote:

Awhile ago I found out that Lucy Lastname (now 14) got herself a boyfriend. Tita Sushi [not her real name] was upset, as mothers often are when they find out that their babies have been having… er… “romantic relations” with a <gasp> boy/girl/whatever.

I didn’t want to tut-tut, so I defended Lucy and told my mom that it was probably peer pressure… [then I ramble on for a bit]

My mom said, “Pero normal din naman yan sa school mo nun.”

ME: “I’m special.”

… [rambling about how special I am - you don't really want to read this do you?]…

But yeah, I was disturbed. Because to me, Lucy will always be my 6-year-old neighbour and it’s weird to think that she got one of them boyfriends before I did. It’s just not right.

Warning: sabawness ahead.

Lucy has a boypren!!!! AMBALIBABOL!!! I’m gonna grow up to be a spinster!!!!!!!! And drink coffee!!! Olrayt!!

I need cats. Lots and lots of cats.

And a rifle.

An eyepatch would be cool as well.

.

.

.

NO!

Kennat be!

Hindi ako magiging old maid! HIN-DEH!

Dahil…

Dahil…

Dahil malapit na ang August!

This is it pansit!

[Sorry, inside joke. Sa mga nakakagets nito, I LOVE YOU!!! Sa mga hindi, sige kunwari gets din ninyo para the more the meniyer.]

Cause hate just won’t cut it.

I can’t cause I’m still learning how [and I tell you, I'm a slooow learner]…

But by golly, that won’t stop me from trying.

.

.

.

THIS IS MADEMONESS!!!

THIS IS TRUTH THURSDAY!!!

CLICK THE LINK!

Quote for the day:

“What is invisible cannot be seen by the eye.”

- UP freshman misquoting The Little Prince

Check out my internet crush David Choi’s YouTube page! See that awesome banner on top of his page? I MADE THAT! Oh yeah. Oh yeah. *dances* That made my day. [I haven't been YouTubing recently so I just saw it awhile ago, have no idea how long it's been up there.]

Anyway, enough about that. Here’s a quick story.

Last night the whole clan [dad's side], or at least those who were in Manila, had a little get-together at Greenbelt. I hate commuting from UP to faraway places like… Makati, but that’s another story.

Anyhoo, I was telling my sister about how sucky [yes, sucky] it was that many of my friends call me emo just to annoy me when I’m obviously, like, GANGSTA. [They be hatin'.]

Then, to explain my emophobia, she said:

“It’s because you’re sandwiched between two of us.” [Referring to herself and our brother - I'm the middle child.]

Me: “Josh isn’t emo-”

Here I turned around to take a look at my beloved brother [who was sitting at a separate table because we couldn't fit the whole clan in just one long table]… and this is what I saw:

Me: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” [Yes I really yelled that in a restaurant. It was noisy anyhoo.]

[Actually, what I really said was: "Josh isn't- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"]

And get this, he even had his guitar with him.

Brace yourselves people. The end is near.

…

*The first UAAP basketball game’s tomorrow! Fighting Maroons, I will always be proud of you, but make me prouder. Please.*